For 20 years, I’ve been deep in the world of leadership development, spending countless hours developing and implementing competency models for organizations. These models often involved endless lists of behaviors—some containing 20, even 30 competencies—that were supposed to capture everything leaders needed to succeed. But as I look back, I realize that while intentions were good, we often made the whole thing way too complex.
The Challenge of Complexity in Leadership Competency Models
From the start, these models became cumbersome to manage. I remember the days of paper-based models, lugging around binders to update competencies, track revisions, and make sure leaders were using the current version. And yet, leaders dreaded pulling these out during performance reviews; it felt like there were too many boxes to check, too many ways to misinterpret what “success” actually looked like.
Even as we transitioned to automated systems, the complexity didn’t go away. In fact, automation sometimes made things worse by requiring a score or rating for each competency—no small feat when there were 20-plus competencies to evaluate! This left a lot of room for variations and disagreement, sparking debates and frustration during performance reviews. Leaders often ended up spending more time clarifying ambiguous scores and arguing about interpretations than actually helping their teams grow. We had endless discussions on subjective terms that no two people defined the same way. I remember asking myself, “Why is this so difficult?” and realizing it was because we’d overcomplicated the process.
In the end, the biggest challenge wasn’t just maintaining these models but actually applying them in real situations. Stakeholders might set lofty goals, but holding everyone to them fairly and consistently felt nearly impossible. One leader might prioritize certain competencies, while another focused on entirely different ones. And what did all this complexity lead to? Exhausted leaders and confused employees, neither of whom felt they had a clear path forward.
The Disconnect Between Competencies and Real-World Leadership
In my experience, competency models often failed to align with two essential elements: the organization’s values and the actual behaviors required to do the job. We’d create position descriptions that listed dozens of competencies, each with a “level,” turning feedback sessions into something more like dissecting a legal document than giving constructive input. The model might be updated regularly, but it rarely felt relevant or actionable to leaders who were too busy hitting growth targets, meeting KPIs, and simply getting the job done.
As a leader myself, I struggled to use these models in real-time. How was I supposed to observe and evaluate dozens of competencies while juggling day-to-day demands? I found myself wishing I could just tell my team members, “Hey, I noticed how you took time to listen to everyone in the meeting. That’s the kind of leadership we need around here.” Simple, in-the-moment sharing my reaction that didn’t require running back to some competency model to translate into “behavioral terms.” The truth is, we don’t need complex models to let people know when they’re doing something right.
A Leader’s Role Isn’t Complicated: Be Still and Listen, Speak Plainly, Share Openly, and Speak Your Truth
Over the years, I’ve seen the impact when leaders leave people confused or second-guessing what’s expected of them. When knowledge and skills are dismissed or judged, people disengage. I remember that feeling myself—the frustration of putting in effort only to feel undervalued or lost in translation. But as complex as leadership models have made it seem, I’ve come to realize people only need a few core things from a leader.
Strip away the buzzwords, the over-engineered models, and layers of interpretation, and what truly matters to people comes down to four essentials:
Be Still and Listen
In a world of constant distractions, the most impactful thing a leader can do is simply be still. Set aside your phone, pause between meetings, and give the person in front of you your full attention. This isn’t about “levels of listening”—it’s about making people feel valued by truly hearing them. Listen to what they say, notice what they don’t say, and take a moment to clarify.
We can have all the competencies around empathy we want, but they’re meaningless if we don’t start with this simple act of listening. In these moments of presence, we create real connections.
Plain Speak
Don’t wordsmith everything to death. Just say what you mean. In my career, I’ve seen leaders hide behind corporate jargon, thinking it somehow makes them appear more capable. But clarity and simplicity are far more effective. I know I was often that person in the meeting, lost as people threw around terms like “OKRs” or “OTC.” (And for the record, OTC sounded like “over the counter” to me at first!) When a leader finally paused, noticed my confusion, and simply explained the terms, it was a relief. Those moments of plain speak were rare but invaluable.
Share Openly
People want to know where they stand with you. As a leader, I used to struggle with this, fearing that being too open might expose me. But in reality, openly sharing what I needed or was concerned about helped build trust and clarity. No more guessing games; people knew where to focus their energy. It took me years to learn to speak up and ask questions without worry, but I discovered that transparency saves everyone time and frustration.
Speak Your Truth
People can tell when you’re holding back. If you’re upfront about what you believe, even when it’s difficult, you build credibility. Whether it’s an unpopular opinion or a confidentiality limit, sharing your truth helps people trust you more deeply. Of the 27 leaders I worked with, only two truly embodied this, making me feel safe, valued, and ready to give my best. They didn’t need a long list of competencies—they were just real, consistent, and supportive.
Why My Motto Now is “Make Work Life Simple”
I witnessed firsthand how some leaders genuinely tried to adopt complex competency models, showing a real willingness to apply them. But then there were others who were just going through the motions, saying things like, "Well, you know, I have to make sure I'm including all voices, so let’s hear it!" When employees sensed this attitude, they knew the leader wasn’t truly interested in hearing them, and it inevitably showed up in engagement scores. Now, that’s a whole other blog post—engagement surveys. Let’s pause that for now.
On my end, I remember the stress of rating my own leader. It was challenging to score them low, especially knowing it could impact their performance and even their bonus. I needed them to improve, but it felt uncomfortable, even a bit disloyal. The stress of scoring against each of these competencies took way too long. The process left me drained, with so many other things I could be doing with that time.
There’s so much more to life than navigating layers of work-based evaluations. I’d rather we spend our energy on things that really recharge us—laughing with friends, enjoying family, or being out in nature. These are the moments that matter most, not feeling so depleted that we come home and collapse on the couch, numbing out to Netflix as background noise. Imagine if we could free up that energy during the workday instead of wasting it on overly complex systems. For me, a reset might look like a relaxing paddle on the water, just letting go and recharging.
What Do You Think?
I’d love to hear from you. What have your experiences been with competency models or with leaders who either did or didn’t embody these qualities? What qualities do you think are essential for leaders? Share your thoughts—let’s start a conversation about how we can make work life simpler for everyone.